I owe you an explanation.
Which, unfortunately, I am not at liberty to provide. At least not with respect to naming Names. But I hope to convey, through hints and innuendoes, the reason for my prolonged absence.
My prior post on lib spex drew attention from an unexpected corner. A Very Unexpected but Important Corner. People far beyond my humble scientific purview recognized my talent for finding eyewear for women who like to hunt.
Further conversations were followed by investigation. The People in the Very Unexpected but Important Corner (PitVUbIC) want to know a lot of things. I suggested a visit to Dr. Schwarz, but they had a different vetting process in mind.
They confiscated my computer. Of course, my records are immaculately organized and beyond reproach.
However, the issue of funding for my research also came up. If you'll recall, my primary funding source has been Dad.
Dad is a great guy. Regular with the kibble and handy with the poop bags.
However, in investigating my financial ties to Dad, the PitVUbIC uncovered a couple of less-than-propitious findings. They questioned poor Dad extensively about his familiarity with illegal substances of the roll-up-and-smoke variety. Having attended college in California, Dad was a goner.
What really put the kibosh on my new career as eyewear consultant to the PitVUbIC is the second fact they uncovered. Seems that Dad has had an enduring penchant for tabouli, falafel, baba ganoush... all foods Middle Eastern. He's spent thousands of dollars on the food of infidels, all told. Not that he ever passed a morsel along to moi.
"The surest path to a man's heart is through his stomach," said the PitVUbIC. "And home is where the heart is."
Dad was deported.
Of course, his new mailing address in Baghdad puts me completely out of the running for the prime gig, which would have paid extremely well. The kibble train would have been completely derailed if I hadn't found some freelance work.
I just got my computer back this week. Funny, I didn't remember playing that many games of Bejeweled.
